Aurora, CO is my community.

Last Thursday night, I took my kids to the movies.  We went to see the 60th anniversary showing of "Singing in the Rain."  It was magic.  (And deemed, by my youngest as "THE BEST MOVIE EVER!!!").  Two weeks before that, we saw "Brave" in the same theater.  Aurora Century 16 in Aurora, CO. 

This morning, before my eyes were even very open, I learned that at the same theater, a man with a gun had opened fire at a midnight screening . . . 12 dead.  70 injured.  Hundreds of people whose lives will never be the same.  The worst mass shooting in Colorado since the Columbine Massacre in 1999. 

I remember Columbine.  I was working for a community mental health center at the time.  On my 29th birthday, the day after the shooting, I was dispatched to whatever church it was.  The mental health center had not been asked to send volunteers - in fact had been asked NOT to send volunteers - but I was sent anyway.  Everything in the media said that Jefferson Center for Mental Health was overwhelmed with volunteers and would ask for help.  Yet there I was, on a rainy April morning, at 8am, finding out that indeed they didn't want any more help.  Over the subsequent days, I became increasingly disgusted with the world, as signs in Clement Park went up.  "Bob's Deli supports Columbine" - or some other small local business with a sign penned with magic marker.  Genuine.  Humble.  Supportive.  The next time I drove by, A banner "QUEST SUPPORTS COLUMBINE!!!"  Then a bigger banner . . . "COMCAST SUPPORTS COLUMBINE!!!"  Long story short, it was revolting.  Then going to meetings at work in which the topic was not "how can we be helpful," but (and I remember these EXACT words) "How can we have a PRESENCE?"  I left my job at the mental health center not long after that. 

Today, I started my day in shock.  I am simply unable to comprehend the thinking behind walking into a crowded movie theater and opening fire on total strangers.  Not that I support violence, but I can wrap my head around a domestic feud that turns ugly.  I can grasp that.  I can't get this. 

I often talk about the Columbine Massacre, or 9/11 in my office as an example of how poorly we as a society deal with being out of control.  I say "the first day of news coverage is all about the horror.  The second day is all about whose fault it is, what we can do to prevent it, and how we can maintain the illusion that we have control and security."  Today, less than 12 hours after the tragedy, Facebook was crawling with political and religious agenda, using the tragedy as a platform.  I am disgusted.  I have considered carefully whether or not to post the picture that really sent me over the edge, and decided that I don't want to give it more airtime.  You know the kind of thing I'm talking about.

Folks, this isn't about gun control.  It's not about the right to bear arms or whether or not it would have turned out differently if someone in the theater had been "packing" under a concealed carry permit.  This is about a societal disconnect.  Remember that freedom vs. responsibility debate?  This is a prime example.  If we, as a people, are going to place such a high value on freedom at all costs . . . well, this is the cost.  You can't legislate responsibility.  You can only legislate freedom.  Now don't hear me saying that we should become a military state - that's not the case.  I'm saying there's no easy answer.  We've spent generations getting disconnected from one another.  Back in World War I and II there was anti German and Japanese propaganda.  The purpose was to make these people less than human so we wouldn't think so much about the fact that actual PEOPLE were dying over there.  American soldiers were fallen heroes.  Foreign casualties were insects.  Vermin.  It is a well-accepted fact that it's easier to kill someone you don't see as human. 

It's not about the right to bear arms, or vigilante justice, or the pros and cons of the death penalty.  It's about people.  It's not about judging the actions of people in a panic.  Yeah, leaving your wife and kids in the theater and driving away doens't make you look like a hero.  But the view is pretty good from the cheap seats, isn't it?  Are you sure you'd be the one to NOT run?  Take a good look in the mirror before you point that bony finger of judgment at others.  It's not about whether or not parents should take their kids to a midnight movie.  This about 12 people who are dead and 70 more who were injured.  It's about every person in that theater whose life is changed forever.  This is about a 24 year old man who somehow decided it was his right as an American to gun down close to 100 people.  (Oh wait . . . ALLEGEDLY.  Cause we wouldn't want to accuse someone who isn't guilty, even though he admitted it, everyone saw him, and his apartment was full of bombs.)  It's about this 24 year old's parents, who, on top of the excruciating agony they must be experiencing at the knowledge that their son did this, have to deal with the blame of the general public.  So DON'T YOU DARE turn this into an opportunity to advance your political or religious agenda. 

Everyone's answer in these times is "pray for the victims."  Awesome.  If I have to choose?  Less praying and more ACTION.  And I don't mean go donate blood, or take some canned goods down to the local shelter.  I mean take a good look in the mirror and evaluate how you act in community.  You haven't seen your neighbor in a few days.  Do you go knock on the door and see if they are ok?  Someone cuts you off in traffic.  Do you flip them off and scream obscenities?  Are your kids in the back seat?  The cashier at Burger King gives you the wrong change.  Do you treat them with respect and ask them to re-count or do you need to make them really clearly aware that they are an idiot, and a sub-standard life form?  You're tired after a long day and your kids are climbing all over you wanting attention.  You're late for a meeting and you see someone stranded along the side of the road.  Someone in your family needs help . . . but you really don't like them.  You've been at odds with your brother for years . . . do you call your sister and gripe about his latest offense or use good assertive communication skills with the person you have the problem with? 

So yes, pray.  Pray like your life depends on it.  But get off your knees and DO something. 

Fear isn't the answer either.  I've heard people say today that this makes them want to stay home and never leave.  Well that's the whole problem.  It's easy to hate from afar.  It's easy to batten down the hatches and hide from it all.  Don't let this make you a hostage!  Go to the movies.  If we have to stay home to be safe, or believe that we can't be safe unless we're "packing," we are hostages to our fear, and the bad guys win. 

Hug someone you love.  Even when you don't have time.  Call someone you've had a disagreement with and tell them that while you still disagree, you respect them as a human being and value your relationship.  Take responsibility when you've wronged someone, and expect others to take responsibility for hurting you.  At least tell THEM instead of telling the 16 people you complained about it with.  Smile at a total stranger.  Ask someone how they are doing and actually listen to their answer.  Don't cut people off in traffic.  Don't gensture and scream at people who cut you off.  When you're about to deliver that perfect cutting remark in an argument . . . don't.  Just shut your mouth and don't.  Treat all people with respect because they are breathing in and out.  Person and behavior are two different things.  It's especially important to make this distinction  for kids.  Don't call your kids (or anyone, for that matter) names.  Same rules apply to political figures.  The president is not an "idiot" or an "asshole."  Use ANY words that describe his job performance, not his skin color, religious affiliation, or personality.  (No shortage of commentary even without those factors!)  When your kid gets sent to dentention for tardies, don't call the school and chew them out because it means you have to get off work to go pick them up instead of having them ride the bus home.  Support the teachers in shaping responsible behavior.  Do the RIGHT thing in any given situation.  Even if you're tired.  Even if it's harder.  Even if you don't really feel like it, and no one will notice one way or another. 

Want to pray for someone?  Wonderful.  Pray for EVERYONE.  Pray every day.  Not for the victims.  Not for specific people.  Pray for yourself and your ability to reflect kindness and community.  When I served as a liturgist at church, writing the prayers for the people was the hardest part.  Praying for this group and that group . . . it feels like calling God long-distance on your cell phone when He's sitting across the table from you.  Why am I singling out a group?  God give us strength.  He already did.  Lord, in your mercy . . . Dude.  It's through mercy alone that we haven't blown ourselves up yet.  Lord, give me patience . . . patience isn't going to come down from heaven in a beautiful rainbow cloud.  It comes from white knuckling it past our need for control.  Want to know where God is?  God's in the trenches right with us.  Pretty sure He was weeping right there on the curb as they took the victims out of that theater.  Pretty sure he was even right there with the shooter.  But people have free will, and we can ignore God.  Which we do.  My pastor growing up used to say "don't be so heavenly minded that you're no earthly good!"  But that might be a soapbox for another time.

It has taken generations to get to this point, it will take generations to repair if we started at this very moment.  Stand up.  Don't tolerate the exploitation of a tragedy for personal, religious, or political gain.  Speak out.  You won't be popular.  In fact friends and famil might suggest you are "sensitive."  Do it anyway.  If enough people do it, these horrors might stop.  Until then, hug your kids every day.  Use the phrase "I LOVE YOU" with reckless abandon.  LIVE your life.  CARE for people.  Demonstrate RESPECT for not just others, but for yourself.  Do what you CAN instead of raging about things over which you are powerless.   

Fight against fear and hate, not people.  Pretty sure there's more to come on this topic.