Anyway, that's what's been going on. So I've been thinking a lot about time management, and how to orchestrate this production without losing my job, my mind, or most importantly for the self-esteem and well-being of my children, MY TEMPER.
The rotating schedule: I often say that in my life, there is time to take care of my kids, do my job, and one more thing. That one more thing rotates. Sometimes, it's friend week. My friends start to get cranky that I haven't surfaced in any form for weeks, and I start getting texts and emails like: "Are you dead?" "Are we not speaking??" and the like. And I set aside some time to spend with friends. Often, after Friend week is sleep week. I get tired and run down during friend week and spend a week making sure I get 8 full hours of sleep. I'd settle for 7. Sometimes, there is horse week, when I remind myself that spending time with my horses feeds my soul and that I NEED to do 
that. It's not just a nice thing to do if I have time left over, it's a priority for me to be most fully ME. Usually the last week of the month is paperwork week. It used to be called billing week, but that was when I had the flexibility to keep up with my paperwork more regularly. Interspersed in there somewhere is usually cleaning week. Which (who am I kidding?) isn't a week.
that. It's not just a nice thing to do if I have time left over, it's a priority for me to be most fully ME. Usually the last week of the month is paperwork week. It used to be called billing week, but that was when I had the flexibility to keep up with my paperwork more regularly. Interspersed in there somewhere is usually cleaning week. Which (who am I kidding?) isn't a week. Case in point: I started this post a month ago. Sigh. A few strategies to mention here:
- Accept where you are: I am BUSY. I am a mother of 2, have a full-time (plus) job and a farm to run. There just flat aren't enough hours in a day to do everything I "need" to do. I have chosen my life. There are things I could do to simplify my life. I could move off my farm and live in an apartment, drive less, use less gas . . . but I think those are some big changes to make. I'm choosing to hang on a little more and see how things turn out before doing that. The PRICE TAG on that choice is that sometimes, I'm running around a lot and have to bring in my crack team of babysitters to help me be in 2 places at once.
- Recognize it won't last forever: While I am actually NOT convinced of this, what I know is that my amazing marvelous brain will habituate over time, and the same amount of insanity will SEEM like less. I'll keep you posted on how that turns out.
- Do what you can: I have an awful habit of wanting to do things thoroughly, and the right way, and completely. HA HA HA says the universe!!! What ends up happening is that I spend a lot of time ruminating about how I don't have time to do _(it)__ right and I obsess about how it's going to feel to not get ______ done. Funny thing though, if I spend that time actually DOING something? Who would imagine that I make more progress than I think!!! This is especially true with exercise. My fabulous exercise inspirer Heather Ann and I came up with the brilliant idea that I could set my sights on a ridiculously small number of pushups, situps and squats. I have a reminder on my phone every morning. It says "you can do this." Sometimes, I actually manage to do it. What I know is that if I try to get all enthused about working out for an hour, I won't even get out of bed.
- Be kind to yourself: don't waste energy beating yourself up for what doesn't get done. Pick the important stuff, give it your best shot. The hardest part is getting over the power of momentum. My favorite phrase is "it doesn't matter WHERE you start, it matters THAT you start." Then I consciously DO something. There's something that happens in our brains that equates obsessing about something with doing something about it. Use that energy to think about how great it will feel to have done that 5 minutes of whatever it is you decided to do.
The effect of using these strategies will decrease the overall level of stress, resulting in less physiological stress and reactivity, less toll on your body, and less toll on those around you. 
Maybe soon, it will be BLOG week!!!
Ummm. Have you been looking in my windows? That obsession to do whatever completely and perfectly came from my side of the family. You're welcome. I will have to print this out and keep it where I will see it often.
ReplyDeleteI implanted a surveilance chip in your brain, mother. :)
ReplyDeleteI believe it!
ReplyDelete